Friday Evening Question #9: Cars You Want To Drive, Not Own

"JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7" (jayzayeighty)
02/14/2014 at 18:00 • Filed to: friday evening question, feq, camaro, italian, british, trans am, jaguar, oppositelock

With nightmare inducing electrical systems, electricity will burn you all the time with one of these JAAAAAGs.

We all have a very attainable dream car that we cannot buy for some reason. Maybe it's an E34 540i M-sport on your local Craigslist for $4000 that needs ridiculous maintenance, the daunting Alfa with "electrical," !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! you can't get a job or significant other with (or can't go 5 over the speed limit in without getting a ticket or find in good shape in the E36's case), or it could be the 70s Lincoln you can't afford gas for or be the pimp it deserves.

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No matter the reason, you can't afford to have the car even though you want to drive it; something you would want for your collection if you were at least sufficiently wealthy, but not for a daily driver or weekend car. One instance of a car that someone would pass on despite being something they dream of throttling and cruising around in is the 3rd gen F-body. They ooze 80s badassness and excess, sure—not to mention the fact that they put down respectable power and handle decently with minor modifications while being easy to work on. However, it'll also put a can of cheap beer in your hand, a confederate flag on your house, and a mullet on your head when other people see you in one, and those are not things people want their car to do to their image.

Any decent, car-loving Jalop doesn't give two shits about how fashionable their car is (I believe the approximate number of shits is ~1.6), so maintenance and repair cost is more of an issue here. Despite this, many people subconsciously dismiss some cars because of other people's opinions of them. Anyways, I'm trying to do this FEQ fairly quickly and be a little more concise (lemonade + computer = ruined keyboard and laggy computer) and I won't digress/get philosophical too much. Today's FEQ is:

What cars would you want to drive but not own, maintain, or be associated with?

Questions of Friday evenings past:

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DISCUSSION (23)

Brian Silvestro > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:02

Kinja'd!!!

Every Alfa

CPT Speedbump > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:05

I can't afford a GTR, but I want to drive one..but never own one, b/c paddle shifters.. I'll take a 3 pedal previous gen GTR though :P

B_dol > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:05

This. All day.

B_dol > B_dol
02/14/2014 at 18:06

Kinja'd. Fiat 500 Abarth

Milky > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:09

I want rotary feels, but I don't want rotary maintenance.

Kinja'd!!!

Luke's Dad Sold His 2000TL To Get a Sienna > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:13

Any Jaguar ever.

HammerheadFistpunch > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:13

Kinja'd!!!

Deuce and a half. Yeah I don't know why either.

BlazinAce - Doctor of Internal Combustion > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:15

My amount of fucks given is about 1/4 that, at 0.4 fucks given for a fashionable car, so the relatively affordable car I really want to drive, not mention it's available in Brazil, is obviously, a Black Opala:

Kinja'd!!!

Now, despite being mechanically identical to other Opalas, the Black Opala used to be a local myth in Brazil as the villain's car. Every bad guy in every bad brazilian movie at the time would have one, and there was even a soap opera where the villain was a Black Opala driving serial killer or something stupid like that. The Black Opala was also a staple in terrorist and criminal activity in Brazil during the dictatorship, so it soon became associated with the types and nicknamed kidnapmobile. Or murdermobile. Or terrormobile. There's even an uncyclopedia page about it, where it's claimed that the Black Opala wasn't built, but born in hell, and made to roam the earth during the prehistoric times because it was just too badass for hell. It spent its early days killing and eating dinosaurs, until it was tamed by Chuck Norris, who found out how to reproduce these fine beasts.

Nowadays, the myth isn't as strong anymore, but take one of these, specially one that's been ratted out a little, and cruise slowly through a relatively affluential area, see what happens.

Anyways, like I said above, it's relatively affordable, meaning I can't afford one right now. Otherwise, I'd probably be in jail already.

Justino6969 > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:22

I'm sorry.. I have to..

"the exact number of shits is ~1.6"

the EXACT # of shits is APPROXIMATELY 1.6 doesn't make sense.

JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 > Justino6969
02/14/2014 at 18:24

Haha... I was waiting for someone to point that out. Nice grammar Nazi-ing.

MtrRider Just Wants Doritos > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:30

Kinja'd!!!

I'd love to take one of these for a drive, but I wouldn't buy it even if I could. It's just not my kind of car. But it would be a hell of an experience for that one day.

PRBot II > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:32

Kinja'd!!!

JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 > MtrRider Just Wants Doritos
02/14/2014 at 18:32

It is excess in the form of a car. Respectable, but not lovable.

MtrRider Just Wants Doritos > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 18:33

Exactly. Even if you gave me one, I'd sell it and buy something- almost anything else.

DeltawingGothamDeserves > PRBot II
02/14/2014 at 18:47

beat me to it.

PetarVN, GLI Guy, now with stupid power > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 19:09

Well I have 3:
1) BMW X5 4.8is

Kinja'd!!!

I love the way it looks, and a 4.8 liter V8 sounds great in one of these, but the MPG's would kill me!
2) Touareg V10 TDi

Kinja'd!!!

See above vehicle and add super complicated and expensive air suspension!
3) 1957 Chevy BelAir Convertible in pink

Kinja'd!!!

Gas, maintenance, and safety. 3 things that'd kill me (one literally) if I owned one of these

Casper > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7
02/14/2014 at 19:17

Basically any super/hyper car.

Casper > B_dol
02/14/2014 at 19:19

Driving one does make you feel silly, especially if you can from a sports car, but they are good fun. I liked the absurd noise the thing made... but it didn't make up for being embarrassed to be seen in it. Now if it were RWD...

JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 > Casper
02/14/2014 at 19:24

Yeah, that just about covers it. Maintenance, looking like a super/hyperdouche, or both?